I divide my mind into neat little compartments
blocking off section from section
like the titanic
oh, you only have tickets to be in third class?
well, I guess you'll never see the soaring heights I can reach
or the sinking depths I can fall to
punch your card, thank you ma'am
this is your stop
nope, no more, nothing to see here
pay no attention to the man behind the curtain
but much like the titanic, if we go down
we ALL go down
fill a compartment to the brim and watch the water run down the walls of the next
the next and the next
until all of me is full
holding steady out of sheer stubbornness
or possibly surface tension
holding desperately to the rails
if you pray hard enough, maybe this train won't careen off it's tracks
I like stories with happy endings
I think maybe because they remind me that the stories are just that
stories
not real life
because in real life there are no happy endings
nothing is neat and boxed up cleanly and tied with a big red bow
in real life, there are no endings
and after the prince kisses the princess, then what?
are we to believe that that's the end of the story?
that after that, their lives are perfect forevermoretheend?
what is "perfect"?
2.5 kids a white picket fence a golden retriever or maybe a beagle
a house in the burbs in the hills in the city near a lake in the mountains
a SUV or maybe a sports car, something flashy and flash or subtle and sophisticated
or maybe safe and reliable to take the kids to soccer practice
what is perfection and happiness if not single moments in time
strung together on bright flashes of insight
a brilliant thread stretching backwards and forwards (fore and aft)
endless and ending and blinding
life and fleeting instants like the flash of a falling star
winking as it goes out
happiness is meaningless if it is constant
you can't have happiness without a contrast
without misery, it stops looking any different from
the boring humdrum of day-to-day life
if happiness were eternal, you would never ever notice it
I'll take the highs and the lows, please
one serving of life at it's fullest
sold to the highest bidder for a price too dear to contemplate
